i’ll be like 40 w/no kids and people will say “aw i’m so sorry for you” and i’ll be like how was the fucking wiggles reunion tour asshole i went to italy last week for fun and didn’t have to hire a sitter
This is a very sad mentality. To think oneself more important than that of progeny is the sign of a failed human life.
so the wiggles concert wasn’t as good as you thought it would be huh
some animals stop reproducing when their habitat can no longer sustain the population MAYBE US EMPTY WOMBERS ARE JUST MORE EVOLVED
“Some men do the dinner dishes every night. That doesn’t make their wives free. On the contrary, it’s just one more thing she has to feel grateful to him for. He, in the power and glory of his maleness, condescended to do something for her. It will never mean more than that until the basic power relations are changed. As long as men are the superior caste and hold the political power in the class relationship between men and women, it will be a favor your lover is doing you, however imperiously you demand it. And beyond that one thing, nothing else need have changed.”—
This is really well put, and it rings true in my own situation - I do all the cooking, cleaning and childcare, but if I fuck up with any of those things, in the eyes of general society, I don’t get the blame - she does, because they think it’s still fundamentally her responsibility, she gets the blame for delegating badly. People think I’m amazing for doing normal, everyday standard shit, and I never get criticised because they think it’s a miracle that I’m even doing it in the first place. If she was doing what I do people would think of her as just a run of the mill housewife, but for some reason it makes me exceptional. It’s bullshit.
I don’t thank him for doing the dishes. That’s his job. I do thank him for cooking, but that’s because I love his cooking. He doesn’t thank me for doing yard work. He doesn’t thank me for feeding cats, and I don’t thank him for feeding cats, but we both feed cats. We swap other chores around, and neither of us feels guilty about saying thank you or not, because we do the chores we want to do and we know so does the other one. I’ll ask him for special shopping items, but he knows if he depended on me for shopping we’d starve. Sometimes he finagles me into a store and laughs at the faces I make.
I do thank him for a rush job of laundry when I’m going away. He does laundry anyway; it’s the rush job that’s special.
Perhaps our hetero relationship is a little different from most.
Perhaps if these things were negotiated beforehand, and both parties kept the negotiation up? Having an unequal distribution of household work just breeds resentment—that’s why we worked things out the way we did. It really helped that he’d been raised to do housework.
“In this surreal, upside-down vision of the world, it almost seems as if it is the Israelis who are occupied by the Palestinians, and not the other way around. In this skewed universe, the inmates of an open-air prison are besieging a nuclear-armed power with one of the most sophisticated militaries in the world.”—Columbia University professor Rashid Khalidi on the United States’ support of current Israeli policy: http://nyr.kr/1nZTIwZ (via newyorker)